BINGO! That's Right I said it.....BINGO!

Good Morning Friends,

So yesterday, my sweet husband drove me 40 miles one way to Polson MT to go on a Bingo Cruise. We left early and walked around town, had lunch and did some DMV stuff. Nice day in town.

At 5:30pm we lined up with 70 other people to board the boat that would take us on a 3-hour cruise on the Flathead Lake. We've not been on this end of the lake before so we were seeing a new side from the water.

Now, most of you know that Richard IS NO BINGO PLAYER but he did have to pay to play so I played his packet and he stayed on the top deck with the captain all evening.

To say the boat was crowded is not descriptive enough. 72 people jammed into an area that should have not be set for more that 50 and even then most planners would have asked for a larger boat.

We jammed our bodies at banquet tables which were 5 people deep. Now, I know I am too big and am embarrassed that when I sat at my seat (luckily I had an aisle seat) my boobs hung over the table. I glanced at the more endowed woman and marveled at how they managed to get into their seats. I can only suspect they do this kind of thing often.

So, let me walk you through the process quickly as I want to lead you up to how I was almost kicked off the boat. The staff checked our names off at the dock but we paid for our packets inside. Inside were 3 banquets on the right side and 4 on the left side. A total of 72 seats were sold. Now we had to line up in the aisle which is barely 2 people wide to pay for our packets. This took me 20 minutes or more, a very slow moving line.

The food was jammed in the corner on the left and the built in bar is on the right side and the Bartender, Teri, either worked in housekeeping and filled last minute or was taking so many antidepressants that she didn't know she was even on a boat with 72 people who actually wanted a drink. I went from feeling sorry for her to feeling like I was on a hidden camera and would show up on YouTube later that night. If Teri was pouring a glass of wine, she COULD NOT answer any questions. The 1-drink advertised was non alcoholic but no one knew that and finally everyone just got drinks and some paid some did not, I never figured it out and I doubt that Teri ever did.

Now I have my packet, daubers and snack. I head back to my table while dodging others. Richard eats quickly and escapes to the upper deck. I should have gone with him.

Once we get started things start out okay. I actually Bingo'd on the last game of the warm ups. Along with two others I received $22.00. I tipped out $2 and feeling pretty good. Meanwhile I am trying to keep the table cloth from pulling everything off the table as I try to breath. The man behind me (in his 40's) is with his mother (did I tell you she looked older than me??) and his wife. I encountered them at the bar earlier and ...you know how some times you just know that this person is going to be trouble? Well, listen and learn.

Someone Bingos and he also calls Bingo. When they check 'his mother's card' she had actually Bingo'd on the previous number. They explain to him that she has a late call and her Bingo isn't valid. He protests that she had tried to Bingo but no one heard her. Now, my hearing is getting bad, but this man and woman are literally at my head and when they swallow I hear them. So although he protest that they are going too fast and need to slow down as his mother can't keep up (did you see the story change here?). The caller explains that he's going at the correct speed and he suggest nicely that he try and help her keep.

YEP, that was 1 of 3 times this happened. AND every time he complained. Now he's ordering the helper around like his personal PA and demanding free (not complimentary) cocktails and he is getting them! Can you see how he's getting on my nerves?

So here's the fun part, ready? So We're looking for a double Six Pack. I am getting closer and I just feel it's going to happen. I need I24 for a six pack. They call G55, then a miracle.....on the screen is
I24....MY NUMBER! I wait patiently and when the caller says I24 , I yell Bingo with a loud confident voice and started counting my money. A the same time, the lady across the aisle from me calls it, the man sitting across the table from me calls it and YEP the man behind me calls it. The helper comes over and passes me by to take the 'Mother's card' to be checked first...it's Not A Valid Bingo! She Bingo'd on G55. The 'good'  son proceeds to get loud and says G55 is still flashing and it's still a good number. The caller and helper talk and say okay we'll let her have it.....I come un glued and began to rant (along with others) No Way! You called I24, I24 is the number for Bingo NOT G55 which although still flashing isn't a valid number...That's BINGO 101 (I didn't say that part).

The caller and helper talk again and realize the error of their ways and agree that I24 is the correct number.

So Good son complains again that his mother tried to call it before he said I24, so she should get it. He says "So your saying it's 3 times now? So 3 times (it's actually 4) she's wrong. I will be talking to the management about this.

Ready? So the man across from me has his Bingo checked and it's Not a Valid Bingo..he didn't have (2) Six packs he only had (1). Ooops! Now I look at mine and realize I also only have (1) of the (2) six packs needed. Darn it. My only response now is ...Never mind....My boobs got in the way and I miss baubbed ...I now refer to it as the nipple Daubbing mishap. 

Can you believe the man actually says, "So she gets the Bingo right?". I think that's when they wanted to throw me off the boat. "NO! You don't get the Bingo! Is this man crazy and am I on a hidden camera? Is this a new Reality Series and we're all just pawns in a game of Bingo? I need to know.

Fortunately the lady across the aisle did have an actual Bingo on I24.

We moved on and the cruise was 30 minutes late docking. See what happens when you have Nipple Daubbing mishaps?

So that was my fun adventure of Bingo Cruising on the Flathead Lake. No one can appreciate it as much as I can, you just had to be there. I was still chuckling this morning but I haven't checked out YouTube yet!

Have a great day and may God Bless you with wide aisles and plenty of room at your table when playing Bingo!

Good Morning Monday!

It is a good Monday Morning!

I can honestly say this is the best day I've had in a very long time. I woke up refreshed (not happened in ages). I slept well and can't remember if I dreamed about looking for that lost meeting room and anything related to finding something! What a relief. It's been ages since I haven't spent sleepless nights looking for lost meeting rooms, missing VIP's, missing or late caterers and almost anything related to meetings. Last night I didn't dream of anything missing! I think chasing those things made me tired every morning!

So this morning I woke up without dragging out of bed, went and did 12 sit ups (this week I am up from 10 to 12 sit ups a day), danced 10 minutes to the 50's oldies station and then after a yogurt I went for a walk on the Wild Mile with Richard. We walked 3.5 miles in 1 hr and 3 minutes. We didn't stop once and walked at a brisk pace the entire time. I was surprised when we finished as I am usually looking for the parking lot on the return leg and thinking Geezzz where is it I'm tired and ready to end this! Not this time. I was okay! I felt good about myself. I said "Self...your pretty good. Yep...I am"

YEAH! I'd also like to say that when I returned home I weighed and I am down 3 pounds from last Tuesday. Can I hear an ...Amen!

So here's to a great week. I am going to continue to eat right and do little things to keep moving. But I am not doing it just for me I am doing it for Richard as well. He's struggling with weight and he's in more of a crisis than I am. He's got diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. He takes medication for all these things and his weight is a huge factor in keeping them under control. I need to not only get myself in shape I need to help motivate him to get in shape too. It's a win win situation.

An Irritating Fact of Aging ....
One of my things about those automatic online forms that we fill out with options for our DOB, what really bother me is when you have to scroll through all the years to get to yours. It reminds me I was born in the middle of the last century.....!

May God Bless you with Strength and wisdom to do the right thing today and if not, may there be someone else close by to blame it on!

DT

Happy Sunday

Happy Sunday and I'm another day closer to my 60th.

For those who don't know I had a incident last week. I was going to go for a walk with my husband and as we got out of the car at the Wild Mile trail I wasn't quite up to par. I was a little stiff, walked a little funny and my thoughts were a little jumbled. My sweet hubby became concerned and after a few minutes turned me back to the car and proceeded to take me to the emergency room. I must admit that the entire few hours are in fog for me so most of what I am telling you seems more like a movie rather than real but my hubby assures me it's real.

At the emergency room they asked me questions which I remember thinking I need to really think hard and answer correctly or they might charge me double, our insurance doesn't pay for this and I'm sure the doctor knows he gets more if I answer wrong. So, "Birth date?" "Yes I do. It's every year at the same time!" I'm 59 going on 60. I'm going to blog about it with my friends when I get out of here!"...the doctor just smiles...I think he just added $$ to my bill.

After I napped a little I got to go with the nice young man on a little gurney ride around the hospital which cost a few more $$s. I wanted to tell him I had already been on a tour of this hospital as I'd been a volunteer here for the last 8 years or so but he was having so much fun I couldn't disappoint him so I just napped and kept quiet as he wheeled me in and out of the lab area where they took photos of my brain which I think was for the lobby art walk and then wheeled me back to the emergency room where the doctor said all test looked good, blood pressure fine, blood sugar good, no sign of stroke, etc. I am good to go!

Richard took me out to the car, drove me home and I slept for hours.

Now I am not sure why I had this episode from soap "The Doctors" but I am really not worried about it. My family doctor is, my husband is, but I am not. Of course I haven't got the bill for the tour of the emergency room from the hospital yet and that might change my entire perspective, but for now I am doing fine. No more slurred speech, stumbling or sleepiness but there's always tomorrow.

I am not taking it lightly I am making changes to my diet and exercise. It's not easy and some days are easier than others. I am overweight and eat badly, exercise little and sleep badly. I want to thank Alice and Jan for encouraging me to lose weight and focus on getting better without being crazy about it. I want to enjoy my life but have quality of life as well.

Thank you friends and family for being so wonderful that I look forward to being with you every day and laughing with you always. I will always be silly and I hope we can all laugh at ourselves together. I know that you will always love me for who I really am, someone who loves you dearly.

God Bless you for being the best people God ever put on this earth! You make me a better person because you are in my life!

Darlene Questioning the high instance of Gas

Good Morning!  I'm a little behind on Blogging but feeling pretty good today about things. I was thinking about what to chat about and yesterday on my walk with Richard it came to me...GAS!

Now, you might say that's not very lady like and I normally would quite agree but in the last few years (during my up hill climb to turning 60) I've come to realize that I am slowly gaining the skills of a Jr High boy when it comes to being able to pass gas. I tried to hide it and shed many a tears behind the bathroom walls and now I embrace the fact that as I am getting older I am becoming my grandmother.

Do you remember being at your grandmother's (or some of you, your mothers) and have them pass gas and pretend they didn't? I can remember being in a store and realizing that an older person passed gas and kept on walking. Without saying "Oh Sorry!" The nerve of them to just pretend they didn't just fart in the aisle of the Dollar Store and now people think I did it!.

Well, guess what I am there! This is where I am laying down now as I confess to you my inner fears. I  started realizing I had fears of public passing a few years ago. Most of you know what a Mic Runner is, but for those of you who don't. During General Session Meetings, staff are often asked to be in the room and carry a microphone to people who want to ask questions of the Moderator or Speaker on the stage and you take the Mic to them in the audience. Once you make your way through the seating of chairs and.or tables you kneel down and hand the mic to the guest so they can ask their question. You wait there until the question has been answered and then take the mic rise and move to the next one. My biggest fear in my younger days was getting through the crowded spaces quickly NOW the fear is two fold. 1. Being able to get up from the squat on the floor...hoping my knees will work AND the #1 biggest fear is that I won't pass GAS AS I RISE! Can you imagine!!! Now, would I admit it and say "Oh excuse me I farted please continue! " or would I say.."Sir, would you please ask that question again I don't think they heard you?"

One more thing regarding passing gas and I will move on. When in a public bathroom, how many of you wait for the lady in the next stall to flush the toilet so you can pass gas? I am to the point where now I consider the timing and try to measure my timing to see if I can make it out of the bathroom before she does so she won't know it was me. Pee, Gas, flush, pull up pants, out door, wash hands, dry (damn air dryer not towels takes longer) and out door...too late she beat me...she passed gas!

So ladies (and guys if your wives are sharing) can you commiserate with me on this or have you not arrived yet?

Have a good day and may God Bless you with a gas less day if you have to go shopping!

Turning 60 - 286 Days

August 21, 2012

Woke up this morning feeling a little tired as usual which reminded me that with age comes less sleep and fitful unexplained dreams.

My dreams always seem to consist of 'Hunting". No, not for animals or treasures but for Meeting Rooms, missing VIP's, airports that seem to disappear from view just as I need to fly off somewhere.

I dream of missing flights, free cocktails and food. It's very tiring as I don't feel that I get anywhere but I am sure working hard to get there.It is so strange to me that I am still hunting for things and it's all geared around meetings and events...Oh, wait I'm a Meeting Planner and TD that explains it!

To my fellow TD's - is this what you dream about too? Please tell me yes, I really hate being alone in this area.

So I need to focus on how to sleep better and get more sleep without the dreaming. I dream in living Color and I can even see a pin drop in my dreams. Dreaming has been a part of me since I was a child, but of course as a child I dreamed of Prince Charming, getting my 1st Barbie and winning the lottery (wait that's my dreams now!)

I've decided to do two things each week by announcing it on my Blog.

#1  Focus - this is a challenge for me, so each week I am going to recognize (1) thing for me to focus on. Whether it's changing an attitude, correcting a bad habit, or even following up on things I need/want to do to improve myself. Focusing is important and when we accomplish even small things, we feel more empowered.

#2 Change - Repeat above

This week my Goals are:

A. Doing sit ups in the morning and today I will start with  20 sit ups. This is to help my back which hurts often. My doctor suggested it and after all she is a doctor so she must know.

B. I will change...my sit up number to 10 each morning! Now that's not cheating it's changing to fit what I really CAN do and not what I WISHed I could do. Baby steps.

Have a Nice Day and May God Bless you with energy, strength and laughter to make it through the day!

Only 287 Days until I turn 60!

Okay here we go! I am officially Blogging and a little scared that I can actually figure out how to do it.

I am writing this as theraphy. I noticed that I have had some challenges lately and wondered if it was just me OR if in fact everyone who's getting ready to turn 60 starts going crazy.

Some of you know me and already have figured out that I AM crazy so I just need to convince myself that I'm not alone in this craziness or learn to live as a hermit so as not to inflict my craziness on others.

So, hope you check out my blog every time you feel you need cheering up, taken down a notch or two and when you just want to feel better about yourself by listening to me fall apart!

I'm starting the countdown to my 60th Birthday - June 4th, 2013 is the momentous occasion and between now and then I want to try and come to grips with my ailments. Which are: weight gain, sluggishness, trouble focusing, headaches, night sweats, and other fun stuff. I will try and focus on each one and get better but I will need advice and support from all my friends and family.

Part One of two

Hi Friends and Family - I am on a count down to my 60th Birthday and I want to share my thoughts and journey with you. Turning 60 isn't the worst thing to happen but I'm not there yet and I am feeling the pain!

You can choose to not follow me and I will not be offended, but if you join me I think we can not only have some fun but learn a lot about ourselves as we're aging.

Today I went for my annual physical and YEP you guessed it I am a mess :). Overweight, stressed, forgetting things, and allergies are getting to me. So many things wrong but OH so many things right. I don't have high blood pressure, diabeties, ulcers, and many other bad stuff that starts attacking us at this age. Although I am tired a lot, don't sleep as well as I should and my middle keeps expanding and it just might blow at any time.

I am going to take each day of this count down and focus on change.

I am going to change my attitude about things starting with the following:

#1 I've learned that my physical appearance is not on the Top Ten list somewhere. The fact is no one cares how I look but me, isn't that weird?

 #2 The idea that the state of the world's financial crisis is all my fault and I can resolve it if ONLY I would spend more money. This was a big load off my mind and I think I can relax about this one.

#3 That switching to Thong underwear would make me feel sexier. Plus, the fact that my old lady panties are beginning to feel just like thong underwear as they keep riding up my butt, why not join the younger group and try Thongs for awhile...Ummmm Maybe not. I'll just buy a larger size of my grannies!

So that's my thought for now. Following my doctors advise, I am focusing on change. Hope you can commiserate with me. It's so freeing to know that others are going through this age thing. It's so much more fun to do it together.

If I can't be rich, beautiful and young...I'll just make those who are realize that it's only temporary and help them learn how this aging thing works. It's my duty to remind them often and this blogg should keep them up to date.

So share this with your younger friends and children (probably the girls only would be best especially since I plan to talk about girl things like eating chocolate without your husband or boyfriend seeing you, using a minipad to keep your underarm sweat at bay, and one of my favorite tricks, hemeroid medicine for the bags under my eyes). Send me your thoughts your suggestions and any cash you feel would help me pay for the big 60th party I plan for myself. Those who contribute will be invited to attend...those who don't contribute will be invited to host the party and clean up!

God Bless us seniors and watch out as we roller skate right past everyone!