Good Morning Friends,
So yesterday, my sweet husband drove me 40 miles one way to Polson MT to go on a Bingo Cruise. We left early and walked around town, had lunch and did some DMV stuff. Nice day in town.
At 5:30pm we lined up with 70 other people to board the boat that would take us on a 3-hour cruise on the Flathead Lake. We've not been on this end of the lake before so we were seeing a new side from the water.
Now, most of you know that Richard IS NO BINGO PLAYER but he did have to pay to play so I played his packet and he stayed on the top deck with the captain all evening.
To say the boat was crowded is not descriptive enough. 72 people jammed into an area that should have not be set for more that 50 and even then most planners would have asked for a larger boat.
We jammed our bodies at banquet tables which were 5 people deep. Now, I know I am too big and am embarrassed that when I sat at my seat (luckily I had an aisle seat) my boobs hung over the table. I glanced at the more endowed woman and marveled at how they managed to get into their seats. I can only suspect they do this kind of thing often.
So, let me walk you through the process quickly as I want to lead you up to how I was almost kicked off the boat. The staff checked our names off at the dock but we paid for our packets inside. Inside were 3 banquets on the right side and 4 on the left side. A total of 72 seats were sold. Now we had to line up in the aisle which is barely 2 people wide to pay for our packets. This took me 20 minutes or more, a very slow moving line.
The food was jammed in the corner on the left and the built in bar is on the right side and the Bartender, Teri, either worked in housekeeping and filled last minute or was taking so many antidepressants that she didn't know she was even on a boat with 72 people who actually wanted a drink. I went from feeling sorry for her to feeling like I was on a hidden camera and would show up on YouTube later that night. If Teri was pouring a glass of wine, she COULD NOT answer any questions. The 1-drink advertised was non alcoholic but no one knew that and finally everyone just got drinks and some paid some did not, I never figured it out and I doubt that Teri ever did.
Now I have my packet, daubers and snack. I head back to my table while dodging others. Richard eats quickly and escapes to the upper deck. I should have gone with him.
Once we get started things start out okay. I actually Bingo'd on the last game of the warm ups. Along with two others I received $22.00. I tipped out $2 and feeling pretty good. Meanwhile I am trying to keep the table cloth from pulling everything off the table as I try to breath. The man behind me (in his 40's) is with his mother (did I tell you she looked older than me??) and his wife. I encountered them at the bar earlier and ...you know how some times you just know that this person is going to be trouble? Well, listen and learn.
Someone Bingos and he also calls Bingo. When they check 'his mother's card' she had actually Bingo'd on the previous number. They explain to him that she has a late call and her Bingo isn't valid. He protests that she had tried to Bingo but no one heard her. Now, my hearing is getting bad, but this man and woman are literally at my head and when they swallow I hear them. So although he protest that they are going too fast and need to slow down as his mother can't keep up (did you see the story change here?). The caller explains that he's going at the correct speed and he suggest nicely that he try and help her keep.
YEP, that was 1 of 3 times this happened. AND every time he complained. Now he's ordering the helper around like his personal PA and demanding free (not complimentary) cocktails and he is getting them! Can you see how he's getting on my nerves?
So here's the fun part, ready? So We're looking for a double Six Pack. I am getting closer and I just feel it's going to happen. I need I24 for a six pack. They call G55, then a miracle.....on the screen is
I24....MY NUMBER! I wait patiently and when the caller says I24 , I yell Bingo with a loud confident voice and started counting my money. A the same time, the lady across the aisle from me calls it, the man sitting across the table from me calls it and YEP the man behind me calls it. The helper comes over and passes me by to take the 'Mother's card' to be checked first...it's Not A Valid Bingo! She Bingo'd on G55. The 'good' son proceeds to get loud and says G55 is still flashing and it's still a good number. The caller and helper talk and say okay we'll let her have it.....I come un glued and began to rant (along with others) No Way! You called I24, I24 is the number for Bingo NOT G55 which although still flashing isn't a valid number...That's BINGO 101 (I didn't say that part).
The caller and helper talk again and realize the error of their ways and agree that I24 is the correct number.
So Good son complains again that his mother tried to call it before he said I24, so she should get it. He says "So your saying it's 3 times now? So 3 times (it's actually 4) she's wrong. I will be talking to the management about this.
Ready? So the man across from me has his Bingo checked and it's Not a Valid Bingo..he didn't have (2) Six packs he only had (1). Ooops! Now I look at mine and realize I also only have (1) of the (2) six packs needed. Darn it. My only response now is ...Never mind....My boobs got in the way and I miss baubbed ...I now refer to it as the nipple Daubbing mishap.
Can you believe the man actually says, "So she gets the Bingo right?". I think that's when they wanted to throw me off the boat. "NO! You don't get the Bingo! Is this man crazy and am I on a hidden camera? Is this a new Reality Series and we're all just pawns in a game of Bingo? I need to know.
Fortunately the lady across the aisle did have an actual Bingo on I24.
We moved on and the cruise was 30 minutes late docking. See what happens when you have Nipple Daubbing mishaps?
So that was my fun adventure of Bingo Cruising on the Flathead Lake. No one can appreciate it as much as I can, you just had to be there. I was still chuckling this morning but I haven't checked out YouTube yet!
Have a great day and may God Bless you with wide aisles and plenty of room at your table when playing Bingo!
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